High School Ministry Blog
Beach Break Recap
On the way to the beach Danny asked someone what we were going to do over the weekend. The person told him all about the fun stuff we had planned, but left out the lessons and spiritual aspects of beach break. It was an honest mistake, but Danny and I agree that if we make a bigger deal about the activities than the lessons and what we can potentially learn, people may think of HSM as a group of people who just want to have fun. I realize this is not the case but I definitely believe we should keep that in mind.
Both Danny and Blayne felt welcomed by our youth group right away, but there were two other girls that nobody talked to. Danny and Blayne went to go talk with them and it’s a bit embarrassing that the newcomers were the ones who broke the ice. I get it, meeting someone new can be awkward but we certainly need to make people feel welcome. Building relationships is biblical and I suggest you read Ephesians 4:1-15 and pay close attention to verse 12.
There has been some discussion about what the summer theme should be and how we should do this and that in order to get people interested in HSM. That’s great, but our efforts will be wasted unless we actually approach and talk to the first timers. I don’t want to condemn high school ministries, but I certainly want to make people more aware of how we can improve.
Random Trivia
1. When was First Baptist Church of Lakewood founded?
2. This Fall 2 HSM students got baptized, what were their names?
3. How many hits does "Friday" have on youtube?
4. What is Jason Friese's favorite sports team?
5. Would Brian Nastase rather sit in a hot tub filled with mustard, or swim in shark infested water?
6. Heather Perrin changed her major this year, what was it before?
7. When is Chris Matsuoka's Birthday?
8. What is Brian Nastase's favorite TV station?
9. What is the easiest way to tell if a Tasmanian Devil is healthy?
10. How many different colored light-sabers are used in the Star Wars movies? What are the colors?
10 tHiNgS i LeArNeD :)
So, last week Chris posted the 10 things he learned from our relationship over the last year and now it's my turn ^_^ I know I write more than he does...mostly because I write like I talk sooooo yea... and there are portions in this that he inserted a side note :P Here are the 10 things i have learned over the last year of my relationship
1) Communication is Key
We always hear it said and can even agree that it’s a valid point, but you really can’t quite understand it fully until you’re actually in the relationship. Sometimes you’ll run into something you know has the potential to hurt the person you care most about, but it’s an issue that needs to be addressed. With our relationship Chris and I both have problems interrupting each other, especially when we’re discussing something we’re passionate about. Neither one of us likes being cut off, so we have to stop the entire conversation and address the main issue of interruption; since this is something I already know, I tend to feel really stupid when we have to address it again, but I know it’s good.
2) Without genuine trust the relationship cannot function properly.
Trust basically means that you have confidence or faith in someone or something. Why would you date or even consider dating someone you can’t trust? Without trust there is a constant need for affirmation of faithfulness, which leads to suffocation of personal space- because you can’t ALWAYS be together. I know Chris and I trust him with all God has instilled in me to trust someone, therefore I don’t have to know his every move- this gives him more room to relax and be comfortable where he is.
3) Don't forget, as perfect as someone may seem, no one is perfect.
Okay this is incredibly easy to forget, especially in relationships. It’s not something that needs a lot of explanation…it’s actually totally straight forward. You could be in complete awe at how perfect someone seems for you, but you HAVE to remember they will eventually falter. We’re human. It’s just what happens.
4) Never EVER walk away completely from an unresolved argument.
Now, by “completely”, I mean you’re done and you never want to touch upon the subject again. Not solving a disagreement in your relationship is like scrapping your knee on asphalt and cleaning it afterwards; it’s going to become infected and hurt a lot more than it could have. Unresolved arguments cause problems in trust and communication- basically deteriorates the blocks you’re building your relationship on. Sometimes though you need to “take a breather”, before talking through it. I have to do this. Chris and I don’t really fight, but we do have disagreements that need to be talked through. I know I can be incredibly harsh with my words if I get too frustrated- therefore I need to walk away for a few minutes, sit alone and analyze the situation so I can address it in a calm manner.
5) Let him be a gentleman.
I had a serious problem with this when Chris and I first started dating. Since I grew up surrounded by guys and rough housing, the aspect of chivalry was completely foreign to me. Opening the door became a competition of who can get there first. Chris QUICKLY informed me that, that’s not how it’s supposed to work. Chivalry is part of being a man- it carries and expresses their respect towards women. Sooo girls: next time a guy walks in front of you to get the door… let him and make sure to thank him. And guys: Showing that you appreciate women doesn’t make you too soft and if your friends poke fun at you for doing it, then they’re tools and you should ignore them. That’s all I have to say to that. :P
6) When he compliments you, don't argue- The more you point out your flaws, the more noticeable they become.
Sometimes girls will do this subconsciously… ladies it’s called fishing for compliments and it doesn’t help your self esteem if you have to pry compliments out of guys. If someone is truly complimenting you, they may not actually see the flaw you just pointed put, BUT now that you did… they see it. Sometimes the little things we don’t like about ourselves are things only we would notice because we have an ideal of perfection that we feel as though we need to meet. So basically compliments = good…just say thank you and know someone actually likes your shirt, hair, eyes, smile etc.
Side note from Chris: Sometimes there really isn't a flaw. Honestly. Girls, you have an amazing blessing of being hypercritical, but it's not good when you're always using that blessing against yourselves. Also, sometimes we straight up don't care that there's a flaw. For example, when I tell Heather that she's beautiful, I couldn't care less about the pimple that she says is on her forehead. Really. So... accept compliments graciously. But be wary of tools who will sweet talk you to get in your pants. You don't want that.
7) Don't lie. if something isn't "fine" then dont say it is.
Guys aren’t mind readers, they may be able to tell something isn’t right, but they’re most likely going to believe you if you say you’re “fine”… and then they’ll be incredibly confused when you get upset with them for not being considerate of your feelings. Trust me. I’ve been there a few times. It’s so much better just to say what’s wrong, even if it has to do with them.
Side note from Chris: Guys are a lot more dense than you think they are, especially when it comes to feelings. Sometimes we straight up don't notice things. So cut us some slack and let us know what's wrong. Oh! And if we notice something's wrong, and ask... TELL US WHAT IT IS! There's nothing more frustrating for a guy than for him to FINALLY notice that something's wrong and try to find out what it is, only to be refused. Then we're stuck because we know we'll get yelled at or whined at or get the cold shoulder because we're insensitive. Every guy wants to shout, "I ASKED YOU AND YOU WOULDN'T TELL ME!"... but that's insensitive.
8) Be comfortable and confident.
Comfortable to me means I can roll out of bed throw my hair in a messy bun, wear sweats and a t-shirt and feel perfectly fine in Chris’ presence. Figure it this way: as Christians, or actually just humans in general, we date with the intention of marrying that person- you want to be comfortable, at your worst, with that person because there’s a chance they’re going to see you at your worst anyways. And confidence… I’ve learned that if I go around trying to be like everyone else, then I’m not being the person I am. If someone is attracted to you for who you are, don’t try and change it to be “better”… more than likely to them, you’re already the best.
9) Support him as he leads.
It’s true that guys are made to be the leaders in relationships, however there comes a point where the leader falters and needs help. This is where their girl steps in. If your best friend slips next to you, would you help them back up or just walk away? The same thing applies to relationships… Chris has weeks where he just isn’t doing well (spiritually, emotionally, physically) and I would be neglecting my role as a woman of God if I were to just leave him to take care of himself. We are called to come along side the struggling and help lift them back to the position they were intended to be in.
10) Approach everything with Prayer.
This is an aspect that is so easily looked over in most Christian relationships. I honestly can’t put into words how serious I am about this point. Chris and I do our best to approach every major decision in our relationship with prayer and seeking God’s guidance in our relationship. I probably wouldn’t have even been good friends with Chris, let alone date him, had it not been for the push I felt from God whenever I prayed for guidance in it.
Ten Things I’ve Learned
Sunday marked my one year anniversary with Heather, and we thought it would be fun to share some things that we've learned over the past year. This is my list of 10 things, and later this week, Heather will post her list. Enjoy!
1. When she says she’s “Fine”, sometimes there really isn’t anything wrong.
Most of the time, however, she has something that is bugging her, but she doesn’t want to talk about.
2. Trust is crucial.
If there is ANYTHING that is wrong, I know that she’ll tell me, because she trusts me.
3. Problems need to be worked out as soon as possible, even at the expense of some other things that might seem important.
When there is a problem, procrastinating with dealing with it will only make it work. Facebook can wait. Your friends who want to play games can wait. If you want your relationship to work, you need to make it a priority.
4. If you say something long enough and loud enough, she might eventually believe you.
This is specifically to be applied with compliments. Because of our twisted society that promotes emaciated 12-year-olds with breast implants as the ideal woman, girls are prone to accept criticism much more quickly. If you’re sarcastic, be careful about the offhand comments that you make – your words have the power to make or break her.
5. Random flower? Made her week.
You’ve probably heard this before, but girls like flowers. But branch out from the obvious. Don’t just wait for Valentine’s Day and Anniversaries. Giving flowers at random times will make her week. And you don’t need to spend a lot of money. Sometimes a small bouquet of dandelions is plenty, because it shows that you were thinking about her.
6. Conversations can be fun.
Who would've thought that talking could be as fun as it is? But don't just stick to the mundane everyday conversation stuff. Be creative. Find out if she'd rather be invisible or jump really high. Ask her what her life goals are. Find out what she hates. Find out what she loves. And, most importantly, remember what she said.
7. The guy should pay for dates... most of the time.
I know, I know. Everybody trip out. Isn't the guy supposed to pay for everything for always? Hold on, don't kill me yet. Hear me out and I'll explain. If you haven't noticed, most of us don't have bottomless bank accounts, and dates can get expensive. You'll have to work it out between the two of you, but I generally offer to pay, unless she wants to help. You can't always pay, because you'll go broke and won't be able to do anything. (Plus not paying for some stuff will flush out any gold diggers).
8. Be goofy.
For some reason, girls like it when boys make fools of themselves. And they seem to like it even more when their boy is making a fool out of himself for her.
9. Go slowly when it comes to the physical relationship.
You had to know this was coming, so here it is. A lot of times people feel that the physical aspect of the relationship is one of the key benefits to the relationship. However, a relationship based on the physical is going to fail. And, as Christians, we have boundaries that we will not cross. Once you reach those boundaries, purity becomes harder and harder to maintain, regardless of how dedicated you are to your purity. The longer you can delay progression in the physicality of your relationship, the easier it will be to have a longer relationship without struggling with purity and boundaries.
10. The relationship is much more of a blessing with someone who has the same core beliefs and values.
Heather is an amazing young woman who is growing in her walk with Christ. She is knowledgeable enough to have a good conversation about tough things. It would be extremely difficult, if not impossible, to have a healthy relationship with her if we didn't agree on the things we value most. Though there is a place for conflict and disagreement, because we know that we believe in the same underlying things, we are willing to talk through our other issues together. She is also a huge blessing in my life because she helps encourage me in my own walk, and helps me grow to be a better man of God.
My Quiet Time
Mark 4:26-29
Today in my quiet time, I read Mark 4, and this one parable stood out to me. In this parable, Jesus compares the kingdom of God to a seed that is sown. The farmer plants the seed, but doesn’t really do anything until it’s harvest time.
It’s interesting how God works, because this served as exactly the encouragement that I need right now. To be painfully honest, recently, I’ve been struggling with whether or not I’m making a difference at 1BL. I’ve doubted my impact, I’ve been envious of other leaders who are apparently having a great impact, and I’ve become frustrated and wanted to give up. Yet, here is this reminder that, in the kingdom of God, I am not in charge of results – God is. I am just here to come back day after day, week after week, checking in and helping where I can, but waiting on God’s timing. It may be that I will never know if I had much of an impact until after I have left 1BL for whatever God has planned next for me, and I can be okay with that because God’s got the results. It won’t be easy for me, because I like to see projects through to completion, but with God’s help, I can be confident that he’s in control, so I don’t need to be.
To sum it up, my IQ:
I: I don’t need to worry if I can’t see my impact, because God knows what my impact is and will be.
Q: How can I encourage others (especially leaders) with this?
Some of you may remember that in my quiet times, I try to pull and I and a Q from the passage that I’m reading from. I’m not always able to, and sometimes the questions that I ask can’t really be answered. This time, I decided to write a blog in response to my question. I hope this can encourage you as you continue your quiet times, because, as you can see, it doesn’t need to be a really complex time.
God bless!
Chris
Phil. 4:8-9
"I meant what I said..."
"I meant what I said, and I said what I meant. An Elephant is faithful 100 percent!"
We are all guilty at times of not following through with our commitments, or saying things without really meaning them. However, wouldn't it be awesome if we were more like Horton? That would really set us apart. Horton stands out, because there are not many people who are faithful 100 percent.
I wanted to use this blog as a simple encouragement to be more like Horton. Let us be people with honesty, integrity and faithfulness. Let's not forget the commitments we made while at camp, or the commitments we have made in the past. Instead, let us mean what we say, and say what we mean; let us be faithful 100 percent.
Who am I?
In the past two weeks I’ve had 5 interviews and still have more on the way. Some of you may or may not have had an interview before, but typical interview questions include, “How would you describe yourself?” “Why do you think you are a good match for our program/ job/ organization?” “What made you want to apply here?” The list could go on and on, but the main point is that the interviewer wants to get a glimpse of who you are and also wants to be able to see if the real you matches the paper version of you.
This week in one of my classes we were studying who we are, but more importantly, who we are in Christ. It’s easy to remember traits like, “oh I’m an extravert, “ or “I’m a good communicator,” but characteristics about who we are in Christ don’t always come to mind or we easily forget them. I am so glad we talked about this in my class, especially this week, because I had my biggest and most intimidating interview the next day. These characteristics about who I am in Christ grounded me and reminded me of who am I and gave me hope despite this time of anxiety. Here are a few verses that I hope will remind you of who you are in Christ, and will encourage you in times of trial.
Because I am in Christ, I am:
Romans 6:1-6 – dead to sin and alive in Christ
Romans 8:1 – not condemned
1 Corinthians 1:30 – righteous, holy, and redeemed
1 Corinthians 2:12 – a recipient of God’s spirit
1 Corinthians 6:19-20 – bought at a price and belonging to God
2 Corinthians 1:21 – established and anointed by God
2 Corinthians 5:14 – controlled by God’s love
Ephesians 1:3 – blessed with every spiritual blessing
Ephesians 1:4 – holy and blameless
Ephesians 1:5 – adopted by God
Ephesians 1:7-8 – redeemed, forgiven, and a receiver of grace
Ephesians 2:5 – made alive
Ephesians 2:18 – given direct access to God
Colossians 2:7 – rooted firmly in God
Colossians 2:10 – made complete
2 Timothy 1:7 – given a spirit of power, love, and self-discipline
2 Timothy 1:9 – saved and called according to God’s purpose
There are tons more verses about this, but these are just a few that stood out to me. This week I want to challenge you to constantly remind yourself of who you are in Christ. You are a son/daughter, righteous, holy, redeemed, and blessed. Write these verses down and be encouraged by them!
Here are some questions:
1. What are some reasons you forget who you are in Christ? Why is it so easy to forget?
2. Which of these verses particularly stood out to you?
3. How are you going to remember these truths, particularly this week?
I hope these characteristics bless you this week! Remember to invite your friends to BLACK LIGHT GAME NIGHT this Wednesday! It’s also the last day to sign up for winter camp before the price goes up!
What if...
What if... it doesn't stop there. What if we lived lives of generosity all the time. One of the things that was great last night, is it was so easy. None of it took much money, and it didn't take much time. Generosity is not necessarily about money; it is really about our heart.
Look at what James 1:27 says,
"27 Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you (NLT)."
James specifically mentions caring for orphans and widows as examples. Think about this, there are roughly 123,000 orphans in the US. What if the church was caring for all those orphans? It may seem like a lot, but consider the fact that there are over 322,000 Christian churches in America. That means roughly that if just 1 family in every 3 churches adopted an orphan to care for, there would be no more orphans left in the US. What James is saying is that we should be known as a church by our generosity, compassion, and love. We get distracted so often by other things, but the kind of stuff that really matters is the stuff that you were all doing last night.
If you like this, write a comment about how somebody else has made an impact on you through their generosity. I'll even give you points for your team.
Personal Devotions
Hey guys,
I know I said I’d have this post out like… two weeks ago, but I failed miserably in getting that done. Hopefully this will be a case of “better late than never”. :)
Anyway, you may remember that I taught a couple weeks ago. You may also remember that I did it a bit differently; instead of getting up and talking out you, I chose to teach you by giving you sample devotionals to work through. The thing is that there are so many possibilities for how you can do a quiet time. I want to use this blog to help you get started.
The simplest way to get started is to go out and buy a devotional book and follow that through the month, year, or however long the plan lasts. But I’m a college student, and you’re in high school. We don’t exactly have a lot of money, and maybe your parents won’t help out with the bill. What then? We know that we’re supposed to read, and maybe you’ve tried to read the Bible. But it’s a huge book, 66 books, really. Where to start? The beginning? But that’s Genesis, and I’ve heard all those stories before. Maybe the middle? The prophets are tough to read without knowing the circumstances of the time period. In the New Testament we find Jesus, and a lot of theology.
One thing you can try is a Bible Reading Plan. This website has a couple of different reading plans that you can pick. After you pick one, you’ll be redirected to a page that has a checklist with readings for each day. If you click on the passage, it will pop up to the right in whichever translation you pick.
The thing with this route is that you will have to figure out your own way to reflect on the passages. You could use the IQ method that I introduced a couple weeks ago. For those of you who weren’t there or may have forgotten, the “I” stands for an Interesting thought or Insight that you had and the “Q” stands for a Question that you had. The Question may or may not have an answer that you can come up with on your own. It might be something that you should take up with your small group leader. Either way, it’s a good way to give you something to think about.
I think that’s about it for now. If you have any questions, feel free to ask. As for points regarding this blog, Jason will deliver points as he sees fit to comments that leave additional devotional tools to help out others who might read this post.
Forgiveness
So yesterday I taught on how we need to actually follow what is preached, rather than simply listening and agreeing with what was preached. My application was to make sure that you follow whatever the application of the message in the second service was. Of course, in the main service there was no explicit application in the message. Instead, we heard a message about how Paul called on Philemon to forgive Onesimus.
What we can draw from that message is that we also need to forgive people in a number of ways. We need to ask that God will forgive them. We also need to personally forgive them and have a new relationship with them when they do us wrong. Basically, we need to do what Paul told Philemon to do. We need to think of people that we need to forgive and actually forgive them. As high school students in the USA, we probably do not have many runaway slaves to forgive. Still, there are probably some people who have not treated us well at school, friends, and family members that we need to forgive.
This week let’s try and forgive others for the things that they have done to us, just like Philemon had to forgive Onesimus.
Trivia time:
1. What was the name of the war between the city-states of Athens and Sparta and their allies between the years of 431-404 BC?
2. What city was Philemon from?
3. What region voted from January 9-15 of this year to become an independent country?
4. What was the name of the first Veggietales “Silly Song’s with Larry” song?
5. What was the first university in Europe to have formally established guilds and thus become the first official university?